Donna’s been a virtual friend for a few years; I “intermet” her when I was preparing to host the Dutch PHP Conference in Amsterdam, in 2010. I had some great role models from the PHP community to show me how to “ringmaster” at a big conference, but I was unsure how it would look on a woman. Having already done a similar role for PHPNW, I’d had negative feedback about being teacherish (something that I still get complaints about), and I wasn’t sure how else to wear that role. Lots of things work well for men but not for women (silly things, swearing on stage (this differs between cultures), asking for a pay rise, falling out of bed into whatever free conference shirt you were given yesterday ….) and I was determined not to turn myself into a decorative but ditsy hostess.

My good friend Kathy Reid talked through my anxieties with me, and sent me a link to a video of Donna introducing an even more major conference: Donna organised Linux Conf AU and the video showed her introducing it with equal helpings of excellence, approachability, and entertainment. Confident that I wasn’t alone, I stopped worrying and gave that conference my best shot. Continue reading →