We got back, walked up to the front door and I decided I needed to water my plants as they were looking at bit sad. So I went up the side of the house to the back to get the watering can while Kevin went in the front door. The back of our house is pitch black at night but I know it well so I just wandered round, right along the back of the house and grabbed the watering can. I then looked around and realised there was something moving in the dark … something very big. Eventually this heaving shape resolved itself into a man climbing out of my kitchen window at which point I started SCREAMING. Forget panic alarms, I was easily louder than any of those, the whole street must have heard me.

As I was only about 4 feet from the man in question, he must have got a fair fright as well (who wanders around back gardens in the pitch black at midnight after all??). Seems like he heard Kevin going in the front and scarpered back out the way he came in. Of course Kevin, in the house, has no idea what is happening other than there is screaming outside the house … I can’t imagine what was going through his mind when he realised it was me screaming. Anyway I ran back to the front, went in the house and after some total incoherence explained to Kevin what I’d seen. At which point we had no idea if there was still anyone in the house or anything.

I rang the police and our neighbours were also out asking if we were OK, they very kindly helped Kevin check if there was anyone else in the house. The police responded quickly and were very good, which is great. I’m sure they had enough going on on a Saturday night! Anyway the fingerprint people came this morning and got a good footprint from the kitchen counter, which was very interesting as I’ve never seen them do that before.

To cut a long story short, we are fine, nobody was hurt (although we both got almighty frights), and nothing was taken. The window is boarded up now and we will get it replaced as quickly as we can. It seems like the intruder thought we were upstairs asleep (car on the drive, no lights on, midnight), and it was just very lucky that we got back when we did, there was no sign that he had been anywhere other than the kitchen.

• coal hole sorted out – we have the original coal cellar in our hose which was full of DIY stuff and other junk when we bought it – not much has come out and we’ve put a lot more stuff in, to the point where you now can’t get in the door and can’t find anything!
• workshop space sorted – this follows on from the previous point – all the tools and stuff are in B&Q bags all over the floor in the other basement room because we haven’t got any usable storage
• garden digging – got about the last 20 ft square of digging to do in the garden before we can lay turf … weather forecast is lousy though so I doubt that will happen
• runs to the tip – many many of these I should think, hopefully taking some of the junk out of the garage
• living room woodwork – skirting boards and dado rails need cutting to fit, sanding, staining and actually fitting. Fireplace needs sanding and staining and reassembling. Window sill needs staining. Window frame needs repairing. Door needs a new handle. After that we might start on the shelving we’re going to build

We do have help (anyone else at a loose end please feel free to come over as well!) but if we get half of this done it’ll be a miracle, wish us luck and have a good weekend yourself :)